So on Wednesday night, I had a dream about Chris Marshall. In the dream, he was still alive and I hadn't talked to him in years. I somehow knew that he only had one more week to live, and I was desperately searching for him to talk to him and see him before he passed. I woke up sad. And no, I never found him.
Chris Marshall passed away March 4th, 2005 while playing basketball at Elk Grove High. For those of you that don't know...and I'm assuming most people who read this don't know his story. Well...I never even found out his reason for dying and I'm not sure if no one did, or if I have just never gotten the story. But, it's really sad.
Chris and I had a special relationship I think. He was a senior when he died, and I was a junior. We had met through mutual friends, Pat, and also through Jessica. We didn't see each other a lot in person but we had a strong relationship. We chatted a lot online. I know...it sounds cheesy. But we had different "cliques." But, we did have a cool friendship.
Well, one day we got in a fight online. Shame, how lame. I don't even remember what is was a bout. That's how lame it might have been. So, I kept seeing him at school and we would eye each other, but I was stubborn and I wouldn't talk to him. I have definately spent many days regretting that decision and my stubbornness.
Because while we were still not talking, he died. When I saw the ambulance, I heard "Chris Marshall fell playing basketball." I didn't think it was a big deal, but I started worrying about him and thinking "I need to talk to him asap." He was rushed to the hospital, and unfortunately didnt make it. He was an amazing boy.
So, this is the reason for my dream. Just trying to find him to apologize and make things right. It's hard because I feel like it will never be okay. Because I never had the chance to make it right.